The Blessing of Kindness

To all my friends and family – thank you so much for all the wonderful things you have done for me. Thanks for your presence. Thanks for the moments of laughter and comfort. Thanks for the support. Thanks for your gift of kindness. You have shown me through your kindness that it is great to be a human being. Just today, my dear friends (MKX and TK) brought me some nice food that I didn’t expect. It was touching on different levels. First, that they thought that they should get something for me even though I didn’t ask for it and I didn’t “need” it. Second, that they actually brought it over. You two are cute inside and out! I feel blessed and privileged since not all people have (other) people who can do such nice things for them.

It is a blessing to be a human being. It is a blessing to have people who care for you.

The Importance of Death

This will be brief, but I will expand on it later. I was thinking about Hell. One of the descriptions of hell in the Bible is that it is a bottomless pit. I wondered why it would have to be bottomless? One reason could be so that it is not full! If that’s the reason, why not make it wider? I presumed that the bottomlessness must matter to the sinner who is damned. It must be that once the sinner is tossed into hell, he will “start” falling… and he will feel that he is falling, and the feeling of falling from so high up will be scary,… and never ending, as the sinner will never hit the floor. I then wondered, wouldn’t the fact that you are not landing be comforting? For example, if you are jumping from a 100 story building, one of the most scary things is landing. If you were to fall from the same building and never land… would it be as scary? I don’t know. Thinking about all this led me to the next thought, the need for finality as we live here on earth. We don’t want to keep falling. We don’t want to be kids forever. We don’t want to remain in anyone state for too long. How would it be if we kept living, and living, and living? Would we get tired of living? Imagine living a life whereby you have been involved in 100 car accidents! (You can do it since you will survive them all!) Imagine contracting an incurable disease and living with it for 200+ years! Would billionaires give away most of their money? May be not! They would keep it for when they turn 4004 years old. How about wars? No deaths at all! So, as much as I don’t want to die, or I am not ready to die yet, I know it is an important part of life. It provides finality or resolution. It helps in decision-making. It spurs creativity. It enables generosity. It makes life worth living. It gives hope. These are just a few reasons why I think death is important.

If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off…

Today, I saw a Chess game in which one player’s Queen was attacked. She moved away from the attack, only (for the King) to be mated next move. The choice was to save the Queen or be mated. I cannot say whether the player who lost saw the Checkmate. Whatever the case, I wondered how many people lose games, careers, etc while trying to protect something that they think is worthwhile. They do protect this thing- a Queen in Chess, a lover, or whatever, and in the process lose something greater. I just remembered what Jesus said in Mark 9:43.

After-life meditations

There are times when I focus on my life and what’s happening to me too much. For example, I would like to live a good life. A life of integrity, honesty, faith, hard work, smart work, etc. It is not easy to live such a life. However, if I died and somebody happened to look at my life or read about my life, he or she would read that sentence in 5 seconds or less, and may be not think about it. I know, I don’t live my life so that when somebody reads about my life, they will dwell on it!

Similarly, when I play Chess, I try to come up with the best moves that I can. When I play a very nice game, I want to share it and be applauded for it. If I can teach people how to play the game better or think through things better, I want to do that. For what? I think this is a very important question. Why do I do the things I do?

I would like to make a lot of money so that financial strife is no longer (or never again) part of my life. I would like to create something that will provide financial security to my family, immediate and extended. I know how it would benefit everybody else, but how will that benefit me? Not just today or tomorrow, but in the grand scheme of things.

When I grow older and I can no longer do some of the things that I do now; when I can no longer work as hard, or as long; when I can no longer stay up for 18 or more hours; when looking good is no longer important; when having things my way is no longer important or feasible; … when I look back at my life at that time, is it going to be worth it? Will I be ready to leave in a couple of days, weeks, months, years?

What is it that I treasure most, such that in my old age, I would like that thing to be associated with me? After death, I would like that thing to be associated with me?

What do people think about it in their old age? What did Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein, Pope John Paul II, my grandfather, people in nursing homes, think? Do they look at their life achievements, or does life take over that they just focus on their “current” situation? After death, do they watch over their life-creations being overturned, squandered, recreated, rebuilt, expanded

All in all? What is the purpose of life? How does it all tie together? Do I need to think about after life? Do I need to prepare for after life? Now?

I know how hard it is to let go of life’s passions – Chess, love, career, etc. How hard must it be to let go of life itself? After all, it is the one thing you have “possessed” all your life. (Does the last sentence make sense?)

Wisdom from the game of Chess

We know from playing Chess that a “check” is not a checkmate. It is just a bump in life. Take care of it, and the game continues. What other checks do we get in life, and what do we do about them? (It is for you to answer.)

We know from playing Chess that sometimes it just doesn’t rain, it pours. Your King may come under the most vicious of attacks, and when you address those attacks, the calm comes. What attacks have come into your life, and how have you handled them?

We know from Chess that it is not over until it’s over. If you think it’s over, that you are set or damned for life, you may be disappointed. If you give up too soon, you may be disheartened further by the realization that there was a creative way to resolve your game (position). If you celebrate too soon, the victory may be ripped from your hands. When in your life have you come to a point of giving up, what did you do? Do you celebrate too soon?

We know from playing Chess that there are up and downs, and we take them in our stride. We enjoy the journey. (There is no destination? May be each game is a journey and a destination.) Do you enjoy the journey of life?

We know from Chess that we have to focus on this game. Give this game all you have. In life, do you give each day all the attention it needs. Do you just focus on just this day and do the best you can on this particular day?

We know from Chess, that each move deserves all the attention; we cannot choose and pick when to pay attention. How about the tasks of this day? Do you give each one special attention, completing it to the best of your ability? As if the life of the day depended on it?

We know from Chess that we cannot just live for today, that we make preparations for the future: you develop your pieces well, you coordinate your pieces, you try to predict the future and act accordingly. In life, how strong is your foundation? Are you living this day as if it’s your last, trading the futures happiness for today’s?

We know from Chess that for most of us, to be good, we have to perspire a lot. In life, do we perspire to get where we want?

We know from Chess that we don’t create gems from nothing, that we build brilliancies move by move. What are our expectations of life? How are we building our dreams?

We know from Chess that we play to win, and we give our best and hope for a miracle win when we face a much higher rated player. In life, do we get up each morning with a winning attitude? Do we still hope for the miracle win when we face the seemingly insurmountable?

I am not saying Chess is life, or “life is like the game of chess”, but we can get a lot of Wisdom by meditating on the game of Chess.

The Art of Forgiveness

7/30/07 Update:-

I have decided to erase the post that I had on something that I had experienced a couple of days ago. I have decided to forgive and forget about the issue. Below is an update on forgiveness.

- Sometimes people do things that hurt you and yet they don’t mean it. May be they don’t know any better. May be they have other issues that they are dealing with and you just don’t know, and you may never know. It is best to just let go.

- When you forgive, you are the beneficiary. That comes from letting go of the baggage that you carry with you when you dwell on the hurt. It is best to just let go.

- When you forgive, you are free to become more creative. Hurt sucks away the creative energy.

- When you forgive, you have created two friends. For example, if you had 100 friends and you lost one because of the hurt you experienced from what they did, you would have 99 friends and 1 enemy. That nets out to 98 friends (may be less!). If you keep the friend, you have 100 friends and no enemies. 100 – 98 = 2.

- God is happier when you forgive. He forgives us many days each day.

- You show the face of God when you forgive. He is forgiveness and we are created in His own image.

Commitments and the Greatest Commandment

Part of the greatest commandment says, “love your neighbor as your love yourself”. One way to look at it is, if you don’t love yourself, you cannot love your neighbor (since you don’t know how to love, or you have no standard with which to compare ‘the love for the neighbor’ with.) It seems this line of thinking applies to other things, including commitments or keeping promises. If you cannot keep commitments you make to yourself, how are you going to keep commitments made to others? The easiest commitment to keep is one that you have made to yourself since you are answerable to nobody but yourself, and you know yourself better than anybody else. As you set the parameters of the commitment, you know what you are getting into. Finally, if things don’t work out, you are at the most risk or loss. Yet, you don’t honor that commitment or promise. Now you have a commitment with another person, you don’t bear all the risk for loss, the other person doesn’t know you as well as you do yourself, etc. What will make you stay true to the commitment? You cannot give what you don’t have. You cannot finally just step up. Love, truth, happiness, commitment, stewardship have to begin at home. As Stephen Covey would say, private victories ought to precede public victories.

Should I repair my car – til death do us part?

There are very few things about money that excite me more than not having a car payment. So when my car was paid off late last year… I thought I would use the money to travel the world, feed the poor and the hungry, buy a house, contribute to my favorite political candidate, buy an engagement ring, save for a wedding, contribute to my kids college fund,… you get the idea! But my car had it’s own ideas, well, one idea actually: repair me, repair me, repair me, and please repair me! So I have done that a couple of times. I may have to do it again soon. The first time, I spent over four times what my car payment used to be. The second time, it was just the battery, so it was almost a quarter of the car payment. Other things I just put off “til this government has money to spend on that project.” So, how far am I willing to go with repairing this 1999 Chevy Malibu? Well, one option is til death do us part. Either I die before the car (which is unlikely!) or the car dies and it is too expensive to repair. The other option is to look at the $80 here, $1000 there… and see how much the total cost is. Is it better to just go and get a new car? Well, I have given myself a limit of $2,000 per year. That breaks down to about $167 per month. I suspect that if I got a loan for another car – if it is decent enough, the payments will be more than $167.00 per month. My previous payment was way over that. My insurance would most likely go up with the newer car. I am not sure if the car would be reliable – (of course, I would not getting a brand new car! Are you crazy?!)

So, that’s my game plan regarding repairing my car. What’s yours?

How to buy more gas for less, or spend less on gas

Not too long ago there was a hearing in Congress regarding gas companies/dealers/sellers and how they make money by selling consumers “hot” gas or “ghost” gas. The issue was that gas expands in the summer (duh!) and therefore when you go to a gas station to put gas in your automobile, your tank fills up quickly due to the expanded gas. The gas meter/pump charges you for the volume of gas you have put in the car. If you have a problem envisioning what I am talking about, let’s look at a simple example.

Let’s say you have a car that fills up with 104 gallons. Let’s also assume that gas expands (and occupies 4% more volume) when the weather gets to 80 degrees. So you go to a gas station to fill up your car. You would put 104 gallons of expanded gas. You would pay for 104 gallons which in actual fact is 100 gallons. So you are paying for 104 gallons when you are actually getting 100 gallons. (If it is very cold, as it is in the Winter, it works the other way round.)

So, how do you buy more gas for less (or spend less on gas)? Well, you can buy gas in Winter only! Not practical because you cannot buy and keep gas for future use like that. First, I believe it is against the law. (Or I hope so!) Second, why waste the money? But what you can do is to create your own “winter scenario”. The goal is to buy gas when the temperature is low. When the temperature is low (cold weather), the gas will contract and take up less space/volume. Thus more gas will be required to fill out the same volume. In your case… you will pay for only 104 gallons of cold/”contracted” gas when in fact you are getting more. Makes sense? If not, I will provide links at the end, that way you can read up some more on your own.

Back to the “winter scenario”. You will need to get to a gas station before it gets hot so that you can fill up your car with the cold, less voluminous gas. That’s the simple solution to buy more gas for less (until the law is changed to require temperature adjusted gas pumps).
Here are some links for more info:
NPR – Heat Throws Off Gas Pumps, and Motorists Pay

California Gas Stations Admit ‘Hot Fuel’ Ripoff and Put Decal on Pumps –Legislature Should Take Action

Feed the Hungry, Save Forests, Rescue Animals, Save the Earth… with a few clicks! (Doable in less than 2 minutes)

This is a guest-post from CatDiva, one of my best friends. She has a clever way to contribute to things that we (should) care about: The Hungry, Rain Forest, Lost Animals, The Earth… You just have to click to a few websites, make a few clicks, and then the sponsors will donate towards the causes that the websites promote. Below is what she does. You can do it too! It takes less than 2 minutes!

Let’s not forget something we can all do every day that doesn’t cost us a cent. Go to thehungersite.com everyday and click so that a sponsor will donate money for food on your behalf. I do this every day and then: when the thank you page for the hungersite comes up I scroll down and click on the link to the Animal Rescue site, when the thank you page for that site comes up, I click on the link to the Literacy site. After clicking on that one, when the thank you page comes up, I click on the Child Health site link, then on to the Breast Cancer site and I always save the rainforest site for last because when the thank you page for that comes up I can scroll all the way to the bottom and on the right is a link to ecologyfund.com where I can click to donate to five more causes and on the last thank you page from those I click on the red link to Wildglobe.com where you can click to save more rain forests.

If you have ideas, suggestions, etc on how we can save/contribute towards things we care about, please drop a comment. Thanks in advance!